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- What is my ethnicity:
- I'm from Estonia
- What is my sex:
- What I prefer to drink:
- What I like to listen:
Jeff Portnoy : [Tied to a tree and going through cocaine withdrawals] Alpa, if you untie me, I will literally suck your dick, right now. Alpa Chino : Man, I told you for the last time, I love tha pussy! Jeff Portnoy : I'll cradle the balls, stroke the shaft, work the pipe, and swallow the gravy. Get it over here, buddy.
Clawing to escape the belly of the beast here in Hollywood. To commiserate, my name assistantatlas at yahoo.
Since I know you kids enjoy gossip, I thought I'd play a little game with some that I collected this weekend. The game's very easy and you can play along at home! There's even a theme: faded action stars. The object is simple: attempt to guess which famous action stars have committed the following lapses in judgment. If you can't guess from the clues, there's a hint at the bottom. And I'll tell you the answers later today, so check back.
First up: when this action star retreated to his trailer to receive a BJ from an extra on the set of one of his movies, he famously forgot to turn off his mike pack.
Next, this still-married-to-the-same-person-as-he-was-then star, while out at a club, invited to two something chicks back to his 'bachelor pad-like' apartment in Santa Monica for some coke festivities. The girls were happy to do some blow, although neither was ready to blow Action Star 2. However, abruptly, the action star announced he was taking a shower. The girls decided that that would be a good time to leave and were heading out the door when the action star raced out of the shower yelling: "Wait!
You can make me come with your hand! And finally, when a writer went to action star 3's home, he was shocked to discover the action star in his library shocking enough he had a library reading a script in his silk smoking jacket. But what really got the writer's attention was the fact that 3 appeared to be crying. And not just any crying, but full-on, mildly-disturbing bawling.
When the writer asked what was wrong, the action star responded that the script had really moved him. Impressed, the writer asked who wrote the script.
Action Star 3 responded: "Me. Also, this gossip is completely true okay, I added the smoking jacket detail to 3, but the rest is pretty much verbatim from trusted sources. Now, it's also somewhat old-- from the peak of their respective careers as it were in the 80s and 90s. Guess away in the comments section, and I'll give you the answers when I get home tonight. Well, of course one of them has to be Steven Seagal.
Unless he paid them, in which case he wouldn't be chasing them down asking for a HJ. BTW, he apparently wrote his own bio on imdb - he's "a striking and somewhat boyishly handsome" Pillsbury Dough Boy. Sly has got to be the one crying, since I can see him coming off as incredibly moved by the his own work. Ah-nold must be the still married guy, I don't think he would look at that as cheating.
Pyyntöäsi ei voi käsitellä
And Maria looks like she's got a death lock on him anyway. I'm going to say the first one is Steven Seagal, the second one is Arnold, and the third is Stallone. I agree with the above comments. The first one is most likely Seagal Half my office played And probably, a silk smoking jacket.
Well, the arnold thing has been circulating for years, but I'd take the other two with a grain of salt I heard about the third one 4 years ago from an exec at Morgan Creek.
The part about crying and library were not part of the story. I just heard that Stephen Segal came out of his office and announced that he'd just read the best screenplay he'd ever seen and when questioned to the author's identity he replied "Me.
The important cinema club
It looks like "Ari's Kids" I'm assuming that's an Endeavor reference win the prize. Stallone got the BJ, Ahnold did blow but didn't get blown, and Steven Seagal continues to be annoying. And frankly, I don't doubt the Morgan Creek angle, anonit's entirely possible that Seagal spent years talking up his own script around town.
Oh- and Allen, you should take everything I write with a grain of salt.
Well, I don't believe it. The Governator would never use coke - his muscles are all natural, the stuff of good, hard American, uh, Austrian work. Think of the detox tea he'd have to drink the next day.
War stories: jack black’s ‘tropic thunder’ tales
The first one is Sly Stallone for sure. I heard it from two different sources who worked on the set of "Cliffhanger", up here in B. Cradle my balls! Um, ew? Steven Segal, of course! Please note that these stories become immensely more hilarious if you actually do the voices for Stallone and Schwarz-y out loud.
#54 - cradle the balls, work the shaft: the sylvester stallone story
Preferably when telling them to someone else Supposedly it was in Seattle during the filming of "Assasins. Atlas, your Governor is a very bad man. Check up on a chick named Gigi "Jeffers". Word is she bent over the Gubernator with her strap-on and he cried "Mamma!
I really wish I was joking.
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Post a Comment. Is on Sly Stallone? My head hurts. I'll have to figure this out later. I know the first two: 1 - Sly 2 - Seagal But i don't know the third. Contributors Assistant Atlas the roomie downlowlita.